Let's go back in time, shall we? The year: 1999. The euro came into existence. Napster changed the face of music. "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" took the country by storm. The threat of Y2K put the world on edge.
And your humble scribe had his first story published.
The good people at The Threshold accepted my short story "Judgement Day." I was thrilled to see something I wrote in print. I didn't care that the magazine's website also featured a snippet of my story. Did anyone find things on this nascent thing called the internet?
The Threshold is no longer around, and since this story isn't too embarrassing, I'm posting it here. I cleaned up some minor details, but this is more or less how "Judgement Day" appeared in that magical year 1999. Enjoy!
Judgement Day
Friday, July 2, 1999
3:55 p.m.
Fifth Avenue, New York City
The hot pavement simmered and sizzled under the galloping feet of professionally dressed men and women filing out of work early. The holiday weekend was fast approaching, and no one wished to experience the festivities in the oppressive heat and humidity that only the big bad city could provide. A bald man in his early 40s took a moment to wipe his sweat-soaked brow and babbled something about Hell and the devil to a pretty young woman in a short gray skirt. She frowned at his remark and then disappeared into a collage of blue and gray. Like a swarm of bees to a honeycomb, the business people hurried toward public transportation, eagerly anticipating the joy of a three-day weekend.
Suddenly, a great murky cloud enveloped the blazing sun, casting the city into utter darkness. Streaks of lightning cut through the blackened sky as the Earth began to tremble. Screams filled the air as people stumbled and fell into the crackling fissures. An orange blaze erupted from the severed ground, illuminating the skyscrapers and buses like a monstrous fireplace. Wild laughter replaced the screams as a large shadowy figure emerged from the giant opening.
“The day of judgement has arrived! Kneel and pay tribute to your king and ruler, the powerful and almighty Satan!”
Ghouls riding dragon-like monsters with deformed human heads sprang from the flaming pit and descended upon the stunned humans. Fiery hot rods, manned by skeletal abominations, spat gravel and dirt as their massive tires squealed under the bubbling blacktop. With his cloven hooves on his hips, Satan unleashed an earsplitting laugh that toppled neighboring buildings like matchsticks. Finally, he thought with a smile, my plan has come to fruition. It had taken centuries, too many to count, but the world was finally ripe for the picking. The world had grown selfish and desensitized, oblivious to the opening it was creating inch by painful inch. Finally, as it had been prophesied, the seam had grown large enough to pass through, and Satan and his minions were more than willing to go through the portal.
But his laughter soon turned to shocked silence as he witnessed the behavior of the humans. A handful of them screamed and cried at their approaching doom, but the majority seemed strangely uninterested. He noticed people looking back over their shoulders, shaking their heads in disapproval, and then descending the subway staircases. Others continued walking the street with their arms firmly but calmly extended in an effort to hail a cab. A pack of slick-haired businessmen even walked by him, engrossed in conversation, indifferent to his presence. How could this be? Why weren’t they begging for their miserable, worthless lives? His appearance alone should have infected each passerby with fits of terror. But it didn’t. In fact, most of them only seemed irritated by his arrival.
Satan’s frown deepened as he glanced at his demons. His hot rods were ricocheting like pinballs in the street. Reckless taxicabs flew by the flipped over roadsters like yellow fireballs as they battled each other for fares. His flying dragons fared no better. One monster held a portly man in its massive talons, but the man didn’t seem to notice. Instead, he continued chatting on his cellular phone, seemingly unaware that his torso had been twisted apart like shredded wheat. A policeman grounded another beast by holding the human-skinned reigns with one hand and issuing a ticket to the stunned ghoul with the other.
“It’s your responsibility to pick up after your pet. Grab a pooper-scooper like everyone else and clean it up. Whatta ya think this is?” he barked in a thick New York accent.
Satan looked on in disbelief.
“Infidels!”
He clapped his enormous hands, and fire erupted from the streets like a geyser, leaving a mass of charred and mutilated corpses in its wake. Now, Satan thought, this should get the ball rolling. Men and women fleeing in a frightful panic, screaming for mercy, unworthily suffering at his masterful hands.
But it didn’t.
Instead, the large smoldering heaps of melted and decaying bodies attracted as much attention as another insect to the steaming carcasses. People stepped over the roasted meat like it was nothing more than a crack in the sidewalk. What was wrong with everyone?
Suddenly, a white light pierced through the inky sky. Harps and heavenly voices fell like golden raindrops as an enormous frosted cloud descended. It hovered above the lunacy in the streets for a moment and then transformed into the Heavenly Father.
Satan’s smile returned. “So, you have come to protect your pathetic creatures from the bowels of Hell? To defeat me and cast my demons away? Impossible! My time has finally arrived! The portal has been opened! I am too powerful even for you! It is my moment to shine! Kneel before your master, Lord Satan!”
“I’ve come to save you from embarrassment, Luke,” the Creator responded, unimpressed.
“Embarrassment? Ha! I will not be fooled, Lord of the weak!”
“Look around you, Luke. Here we are, standing toe to toe for the first time in … I don’t know how long, and no one’s even blinked.”
Satan looked around. His demons were killing and butchering scores of people, but there was no alarm, no hysteria, no begging. People marched on, unfazed by the slaughter before them. God was right. This was no fun!
Satan sat and put his elbows on his knees. A rush of obscenities was hurled his way as his huge bulk blocked off a subway entrance. Satan lowered his face into his hands.
“Hey, now there’s no need for that. It’s not your fault.”
“I’m a failure,” Satan sniffed.
“Now c’mon, you know that’s not true,” the Lord responded as He put a comforting hand on the devil’s scaly shoulder.
“Oh, please,” the devil squealed, waving Him away.
“Really. Would I lie?”
Satan looked up, his blood-filled tears running down his pockmarked skin. “Then what happened, Al?” he asked, sounding like a child who had just scraped his knee.
God sighed. “Things change, Luke. This whole thing is like a mutated science project. No one cares anymore. I didn’t think it would turn out like this.”
“So why don’t you just blow it up? Start over?”
“It’s been done, remember? Besides, I’m not a quitter.”
Satan looked out at the people in the streets. Severed heads were being kicked around like soccer balls by the hurrying business people.
“So it’s really not my fault?” the devil asked, his spirits rising.
“No.”
“I was frightening, wasn’t I?”
“I’ve never seen you look better. Very theatrical.”
“Yeah. We wanted to put on a good show.” A ghoulish grin broke across his face like crackling ice, but it quickly melted. “What caused them to become so callous?”
“Well, it’s a combination of … oww!” God looked down and saw a man with a briefcase climbing over His toe.
“Move it or lose it, pal.”
Satan flicked a fireball at the little man, and he disappeared in a cloud of smoke.
“Thanks,” the Lord responded sarcastically.
“Don’t mention it,” the devil said, blowing on his finger like a gunslinger.
“Come on, let me buy you a beer. We can talk about the old days.”
The Lord helped Satan up and put His arm around the devil’s shoulder. The two walked unnoticed down Fifth Avenue, leaving behind the scrambling people and speeding taxis as the city continued to buzz. After all, it was the holiday weekend.
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